Thirty ways you know you`re a South Australian

You know you're a South Aussie when ...

1. You know what bung fritz is.

2. The first question you ask someone you just met is, 'what school did you go to?'

3. You say " heaps good " and people don't look at you strangely.

4. You've prank-called Bob Francis.

5. You used to go on dates to Skyshow .

6. You've nearly been killed at the Britannia Roundabout.

7. You've ridden the Rundle Mall pigs.

8. You hate the only other AFL team in the state so much that you actually cheer for Collingwood when they play your rival.

9. You claim any celebrity who has ever visited here as a South Australian.

10. You went to bed when Fat Cat told you to.

11. You flip your beer before opening it.

12. You feel nostalgic about the demise of the double-cut roll.

13. You enjoy whingeing about the fact that we're a state of whingers.

14. You submit Xavier Minniecon as a "spotted" for the Sunday Mail's gossip column.

15. You're inexplicably proud of homegrown inventions people in other places would never think to be proud of. Such as Hills Hoists ... 

     ... Victa mowers ...

              ... and even one-way freeways.

16. You hate Victorians for no real reason.

17. You think crying over spilt milk is entirely valid - if that milk is Farmers Union Iced Coffee.

18. You think boat , not spinach , when you hear the word 'Popeye'.

19. You still can't believe Dazzeland closed down.

20. You feel strangely possessive about the precise position of the Mall's Balls.

21. You NEVER EVER let another driver merge into your lane ahead of you. Ever.

22. You know that ' pie floater ' isn't a dirty euphemism.

23. You call the Murray River the River Murray because you think it sounds posh(er).

24. You're secretly proud when tourists ask you what part of England you're from.

25. You've gotten third-degree sunburn on the Hill at Adelaide Oval.

26. You pretend to know the difference between a tempranillo, a grenache and a petit verdot.

27. You felt guilty and rushed out to buy a jar of Spring Gully pickles a few months ago.

28. You think Vili is a culinary god.

29. Your family used go on holiday at the same spot on the river or coast each year.

30. You have no problem in stealing something from Victorians , since they already stole something from us.

And yes, we haven't mentioned Woodies, Haigh's, Bickford's, Stobie poles, FruChocs or Kitchener buns. So over to you - you know you're South Australian when ...

THE ADVERTISER 

AUGUST 08, 2013 8:00PM